What were you made for?

July 11, 2024

The Barbie movie might be dated conversation, but recently I listened to a podcast from a pastor* on this subject that stuck with me. In his opinion, Barbie is really a movie about identity and that only when she encounters her creator (Ruth Handler) does she “find herself”.

He went on to say (and I paraphrase here) that this is no different than us as humans. Our

creator defines who we are and why we were created. So, when we discover our maker, then it’s no surprise, we also tap into our true selves and purpose.

I was intrigued and had to admit, based on my own story, this Barbie analogy rang true.

For most of my life I not only didn’t I know what I was made for, but I didn’t even know who I was. 

What gave me joy? 

What was I passionate about? 

What were my gifts? 

What did I truly want to be or do with my life?

There was a longing for something I could not name. But I was so preoccupied with hiding my secrets that I didn’t dare to go deep to find out.

Turns out I was striving for so long to be Stereotypical Barbie when Weird Barbie, broken from “being played with too roughly,” was truer to me.

One of my favorite scenes in the movie is when Barbie, stirred by her newly acquired emotions, says to Ruth, her creator, “maybe I’m not Barbie anymore”. In the presence of her Creator, who comforts and encourages, she begins to understand there are greater possibilities for her life.

Ruth responds that she has no more control over Barbie than she does her own daughter.

Near the end of the movie, I watched through a blur of tears the tender montage set to the

Billie Eilish song, What Was I Made For? Why so emotional? After all, this was just a silly Barbie movie, right? But later my daughter, who watched with me, confessed she, too, was moved to tears. So real and touching. And complicated.

I think it summed up visually the multi-faceted emotions of being girls who grow into women. We often don’t know how to feel. Or who to be.

Be a good girl. But stand up for yourself.

Don’t be too emotional. But don’t be cold and unapproachable.

Focus on your career. But be the ideal mother.

Keep your house Pinterest perfect. But no need for contractors. DIY!

You’re never too young for Botox. But, hey, embrace those “character lines.”

Get the latest beauty hacks and influencer fashions to look your sexiest. 

But DO NOT be a sex object. 

Speak up. Use your voice. But chances are you won’t be believed.

In a world that often spews such mixed messages and expects so much from us, we become as confused as Barbie, trying to be everything to everyone.

It wasn’t until my 40’s, through spending time with my creator that I learned how to be the true me. 

Since then, “being real” is the most grounding gift I give to myself, relationships,

conversations, work, faith and you, through my monthly messages. The pretend life is surface living. I want to go deep. Even to the painful parts, because feeling the whole spectrum of emotions is how we learn to live authentically.

What was I made for? 

A divine and perfect purpose put in place just for me. 

The real me.

* In case you’re interested, you can check out the podcast on Spotify. Dave Lomas, lead pastor at Reality San Francisco speaks on this topic in two episodes: The Divine Call of Identity and Still Processing Episode 8.